Minjoon stared intently at the rectangular gimpab in his hand and slowly unwrapped it, amazed at his digestive system’s ability to still feel hunger.
Yes, there’s an old saying that ghosts who die after having a meal will look good.
Minjoon had the crazy idea that if he died after eating, his skin would become as bright as water and that the angel of death might take him as his lover. When he decided to die, strange thoughts began to plague his mind.
“Now that I think about it, that’s also scary. Mom, dad. Please forgive this sinning son. If it’s a sin to be gay, then don’t think of me as dead and instead pretend that I’ve gone to marry somewhere far away…”
Minjoon dried his tears with the back of his hand and shoved the triangular gimpab into his mouth. Ever since he was young, he mother had been an unusual person who beat him every time he let others push him round. If she knew that he was this crazy about a man who had stolen his passport to take out private loans and had stolen his tuition money, not even 10 lives would be enough to save him from his mother.
‘Taisei, you son of a bitch. That you’re going to report me and sell me to a gay club? Who do you think you are? I may be dying now, but this isn’t the end. I will come back as the grim reaper to haunt you, just wait and see!”
Beeeeeeep.
“Oh that surprised me. What a ruckus. Are you people going to be held responsible if I die of a heart attack?” At the sound of the horn , Minjoon yelled and looked back.
At that moment, the gimpab fell to the ground and Minjoon instinctively stuck himself to the wall. Is this the black wave I’ve heard so much about? Minjoon shuddered and held his breathe at the sight of the black mercedes Benz he had only seen in movies. Although the cars didn’t look suspicious, Minjoon knew the type of people who were residing inside.
Since he lives in Japan, it was normal that he saw them at least once. To be honest, he once had the crazy idea ’what if I had a yakuza for a lover?’ However, when Minjoon saw the slow moving black Mercedes in front of his eyes the moment he was ready to die, he prayed earnestly so that they wouldn’t see him.
What can I do if the boss falls in love with me because I’m so handsome? I’ve heard they are so rough, some will make you satisfy ten men at once… oh, God. What will I do if I’m torn and I die from excessive bleeding? No matter how much I want to die, I don’t wish to die like this.
There was the sound of a closing door followed by a worried shout of young master. Minjoon, who was still stuck to the wall, opened his eyes and slowly turned his head towards the Benz. Suddenly, something came running and jumped into his arms. The warmth and smell of baby powder surrounded Minjoon’s sense of smell. Stunned, he quickly hugged the body in his arms. It was a boy of about 3 years old.
“Mama. Mama”
’Mama, yes what a sweet word. I also have a mom back in Korea.. wait, mama? Who??’
Minjoon was so shocked that he hurriedly separated the boy from his body a bit too roughly.
“Kiddo, I’m not your mom. Look closely. Of course, you may be confused, but I’m actually a man. A man just like you, ok? Do you understand now?”
Minjoon was surprised when he finally saw the boy in his arms. He had never before seen such a lovely and cute child before. The boy had glossy hair with round cheeks and was wearing a neat suit and coat. The boy looked at Minjoon with pouty lips and a tearful face.
“Mama… I missed you. Mama.”
He spoke to Minjoon in a small voice, as if he could not yet speak well.
“Y-yes. I’m sure I would have missed you too, but kid…”
“Touma, I’m Touma.”
“Yes, Touma. I’m sorry but I’m really not your mom.”
“No, you are mama.”
Touma, who finally burst into tears, was hugged by Minjoon as he loudly wept with a runny nose and open mouth as he was buried into Minjoon’s padded jacket.
Click, click, click.
A terrifying mechanical sound that the average person would never hear in their lives could be heard coming continuously from the back of Minjoon’s head. He slowly turned his rigid head and was met with the barrel of a gun pointing directly at him. In that moment, he instinctively held the boy tighter in his arms, took a step back and fell directly to the ground.
Three men dressed in identical black suits were staring at Minjoon. Two of them were terrifying enough that whoever passed them by could recognize them without the need to say ‘hey, I’m a yakuza’. The final of the three held an air of higher elitism than a yakuza. The man was constantly talking to Touma, however, the gun in his hand was pointing directly at Minjoon’s forehead.
“Young master, come this way. If you keep doing that, it will cause problems for him too.”
’Problem? What kind of problem? Don’t tell me you’re going to kill me without leaving a single trace behind.’
Minjoon once again pushed Touma away from himself, imagining the bloody scene of his body floating in the Tokyo bay.
“W-well, Touma. Like I said before, I’m not your mom.”
“You’re mama. Touma’s mama.”
As Touma’s yelling grew louder, Minjoon looked towards the elite man and shouted, “Where is the boy’s mom?”
“Sorry, we must have surprised you. I know it’s difficult but could you hand the young master over?’
“Of course, I’d love to.”
Minjoon began to stroke Touma’s head in a soothing manner.
“Good boy, Touma. I have to go because the good ahjussi is here to pick you up. Our Touma is a good listener, right?”
“Mn, Touma goes if mama goes too”
“We can’t do that. If you go first, I’l catch up with you.”
When he was younger, he remember countless crying because he was deceived by these words. Minjoon never expected that a day would come where he needed to tell the same lie. Touma looked at Minjoon and shook his head. Then he said with a snap.
“Don’t wanna. Touma no go alone.”
‘Kids these days are born unusually smart. Do they study in the womb before being born or what?’
Minjoon tried his best to soothe Touma.
“Then if you tell me where your house is, this hyung make sure to visit. I really mean it, pinky promise. I’ll eat a thousand needles if I break my promise.”
Something cold and heavy was pressed against Minjoon’s head. The barrel, which had been pointing at him from a distance, was now being pressed directly into the back of his head.
‘No, whats wrong with what I just said?…Wait, wait just a minute.’
“W-well, what about.. 2,000 needles? I’ll eat 2,000 needles.”
Minjoon, who thought the gun was pressed against the back of his because of the amount of needles, shook as he increased the quantity o needles.
“No wanna. Me go with mama.”
Finally, Touma held on to Minjoon’s jacket even tighter.The elite yakuza, who was watching the scene, sighed and spoke to Touma with an embarrassed voice.
“Young master, if you continue doing this, your papa will scold you.”
When he heard the word ‘papa’ Touma’s shoulder flinched as he began to cry. Minjoon was perplexed as he heard Touma cry out loud. How frightening is the father for him to react like this? He suddenly felt sorry for the boy as he hugged him tighter. But as he hugged Touma, a word suddenly flashed across is mind like lighting.
Young master. No matter how many people work as house helpers, how many people in the world will call a child young master? Minjoon began to look around quickly.
‘Wait a minute. This kid has a father. But if they called Touma ‘young master’ then his dad must be… no, it cant be. Am I holding the son of the yakuza boss right now?’
Minjoon swallowed the heavy clump in his throat as he stared at the boss’s son who had jumped into his arms. He shook his head vigorously as he stared at the back of the cute boy’s head. When Touma saw this, he smiled with a face full of tears and snot as he shook his head along with Minjoon.
‘No, Touma. Now is not the time to imitate me. Please go back with your papa.’
When Minjoon thought about Touma being the boss’ son, a shudder went down his spine. The father of such a cute and angelic child didn’t seem to fit with the image of the boss he was drawing in his head. He was also the boss of the yakuza.
Touma continued to happily hold Minjoon’s face with his small hands as he said, “Mama.”
“I’m not.. your.. mama.” Minjoon didn’t dare to raise his voice out of fear of something happening any moment.
“What’s going on here?”
Minjoon’s heart froze at the sound of t he unexpected voice. If a voice alone can make your body freeze, then the owner of that voice must be the most formidable in the world. Minjoon’s heart melted in an instant. His gay instinct began to go off with that low and sexy tone.
Minjoon slowly turned his head, hugging Touma closer as he burst into tears at the sound of the voice. But before he could turn completely, Touma, who had been crying uncontrollably, suddenly lifted his head and shouted at the owner of that sexy and low voice.
“No papa. Me going with mama. Go away.”
’Oh, shit, no don’t yell like you dislike him. What will happen if he hates me and I get caught too?’
“Both of you, get in the car.”
’See, he’s telling us both to get in the car.. what?!? No, this isn’t right’
Minjoon didn’t know where he had gotten the courage, but he suddenly stood up and turned around holding Touma in his arms. Like this, he confronted the man.
1 second, 2 seconds, 3 seconds… not much time had passed, but for Minjoon it felt as if time had stopped for a thousand years. The word ‘man’ was the first word that came to Minjoon’s mind. It felt as if the word had been invented specifically for him. He was really a man.
He always thought the term ‘yakuza’ was use to refer to those terrifying people with wide shoulders and grease flowing through the thick and dull layers of skin. In fact, it seemed like all the yakuza’s on tv were like this.
However, this man was like the true definition of manly sexiness. In short, he was a man so sexy and manly he feared he would only meet a man like this once in his lifetime. Minjoon, who had forgotten what they were discussing, turned pale and stood there blankly with his mouth wide open.
“Mama, let’s go. Papa angry.”
Minjoon turned his eyes towards Touma, who had suddenly stopped crying and appeared as if he couldn’t contain his happiness, and finally regained his senses turning towards the man once again. However, as soon as their eyes met, he quickly bowed his head at a 45 degree angle and stared at the ground. He opened his moth, trying his best to not appear nervous and contain his shaking.
“W-why do I have to get in the car too?”
“…’
“Please, explain the situation to your son.”
“…”
“How I’m not his mom. We cant go…together…”
Without saying a single word, a hand in leather gloves slowly pulled out a cigarette. A man standing next to him saw this and quickly lit a flame for him. Minjoon’s voice began to waver and gradually began to disappear. Unable to stand the smell of cigarettes by nature, he quickly covered his nose with one hand murmured to himself.
‘You tried to die but didn’t even prepare your heart. What if you were shot to death and the grim reaper couldn’t even recognize you? Such a dirty and unfortunate bastard.’
“Hey.”
“Yes..?’
“Who’s the dirty and unfortunate guy?”
Minjoon thought to himself that the reason such a shuddery sweet voice caused him to slightly laugh was because his death was approaching. And when he turned over the words he had been thinking that came out of the mouth of this man, he was surprisingly calm. He was determined to die, but he didn’t believe it should be this way.
He lifted his head from the 45 degree angle and looked directly at the man. Although he wanted to see his face before dying, the man’s intense eyes were too much to bear. However, Minjoon, who believed this was the end of his life, was brave. He began to talk about his current sitauation without a moment’s doubt.
“I..I’ve been having a really hard time lately. It’s become so difficult that I even tried to end my life, but honestly, I never even dreamed that I’d get shot to death. I thought I’d die normally. Be it by taking medication, being hit by a car or even drowning, you know how normal people die. I’m only guilty of walking this through this narrow road. But, how bad can it be to have bad luck?… Really, I cant even return to Korea…”
“You’re Korean?”
“Sorry…? Yes.”
“Don’t ask when you’re being questioned.”
“Yes.”
Minjoon replied back, swallowing thickly as he saw the man’s eyes flash. As the man’s sharp gaze swept over Minjoon, he felt his body tense up.
Just then, the man dropped the cigarette he was holding and ground it with his foot, leaving a hollow space. The man turned around, leaving only two words of parting for the pale faced Minjoon.
“Get on.”
When the man got into his car, the elite gangster politely, but with a different air than before, grabbed Minjoon and Touma who glued together like gum and quickly put them inside the Mercedes Benz.
“Wait a minute. You cant do this. Eh? Don’t start the car, I’m getting off.” Minjoon, who was pushed inside, threw Touma aside and struggled to get off.
Just then, the elite gangster spoke in a cold tone, “If you get out of the car, I wont stop you. However, I cant guarantee that the cars following us will get out of the way. If you’re wise, I’d advise you to think about the situation you are currently in.”
At his words, Minjoon recalled the dead cat he saw on a road one day. The sight of its head disappearing and its body sticking to the road had haunted him for years. Minjoon once again hugged Touma’s against his body like a lifeline, went back to his seat and sat with his legs together.
As they left the alley, their slow march began to turn into a fast pace. He tried to keep an eye on the direction they were taking, but soon gave up. It was difficult to distinguish the darkening outside through the tinted windows. Minjoon stared at Touma who had fallen asleep at one point and began to laugh like a madman.