***
***
Edlade closed his eyes.
It was definitely hard to believe.
If he had heard these words in the morning, he would have been angry with the doubt that he was being ruled by evil forces.
There is nothing in this world more precious than your own life.
Because he was born with such a fate.
As the head of the guardian family Philemon, life is bound by a contract, so nothing is more important.
If there is something precious, then it would be a fairy. That is the fate of Edlade Philemon.
Halbert, who knew it better than anyone else, said it as if it was natural.
“I… Did I love Lily?”
“Yes.”
“How long?”
“It’s been a long time.”
“…..”
Edlade covered his eyes with one arm.
His heart, which had been throbbing and aching, was no longer in pain.
As if it wanted him to know the truth.
Edlade was wondering how to organize his complicated thoughts.
“Get out.”
“……I don’t know why you are asking, but there are no lies in what I say.”
“Get out.”
In the end, there was the sound of a door closing.
There is no lie in what I say. Please don’t misunderstand what I said.
It sounded like that.
“Sigh…….”
The moment Edlade got to know the truth, his body did not have the strength to realize the reality.
‘Lily.’
It was a familiar name as if it was a name he had called out with so much pain.
“Lily.”
It was the same when he pulled it out of his mouth.
The reason was unknown, but the woman, He seemed to have called her Lily.
It wasn’t even foggy. Edlade couldn’t remember anything. It was like white wallpaper without a single speck of dust.
What to believe?
Slowly he got up and took out a piece of parchment that had nothing written on it. Perhaps when today passes and tomorrow comes, he will forget Lily again. And it was clear that Halbert wouldn’t say anything unless he asked Halberts directly, like today.
Eek~
He gritted his teeth. ‘Why should I forget?’
Familiarity felt even without memory couldn’t be a lie. He shouldn’t doubt it. However, he did not trust others enough.
How could his magic seal be engraved on the first page of Halbert’s journal?
He doesn’t believe it unless he writes it himself.
“The only person I can trust in me.”
He won’t believe anyone who says it.
He’ll forget her again tomorrow.
The dances they danced together, the conversations they had, and the emotions he felt at the time.
He will probably forget everything.
Just like this morning when he woke up and opened his eyes.
Edlade slowly picked up the inkless pen.
As he doesn’t trust anyone, he’ll be suspicious if it’s an ordinary document.
Pfft – A laughter came out.
The disappointing thing was that the biggest obstacle in the present situation was himself.
The reason he did not trust others was that he was in a position where he had no choice but to do so.
It’s clear that Lily is special to him, so everyone cares about her but he doesn’t believe in himself.
Because she’s a stranger, she is not in his memory.
The reason she’s not just in his memory is that she’s the only one who has been rejected in his memory.
Until he realizes it, he will continue to do so until he realizes she’s special.
“So, to make sure…”
He has to remember the memory of the present.
Didn’t want to forget that she is a special being.
He pushed his magic into the pen.
It was a different magical power, and it was a power that no one other than Halbert knew.
If it was written with this magical power, he would believe it like a magic seal.
Ironically, he doesn’t trust others but doesn’t even suspect his actions.
There must be a reason for that.
So he had no choice but to write it in person. So that he can be aware by himself without asking Halbert like he did today.
A letter to the future self.
‘Today’s diary for me who can only remember today.’
‘The only thing I can do right now… is this.’
If he followed his heart, he wanted to run to Lily right away.
As he danced while holding her hand, he wrapped his arms around her delicate shoulder once more, wanting to check it over and over again.
He wanted to make sure that he wasn’t feeling impulsive.
As he trembled, he did not let go of his gripping hand, and even remained in his detached manner, her face blushed as his hand wrapped around her waist.
That figure of her makes him twitch below his waist over and over again, and he wants to run to her right away and kiss her luscious lips.
He wanted to confirm his desire for her to his heart’s content.
ugh-
He tossed the broken quill and picked up a new pen.
As he wrote down his feelings and desires, he wrote the letter to remind himself.
‘Edlade’
Her voice softly shouts.
A heart that wants so much.
He felt a sense of disappointment when he looked at the parchment paper filled with his candid heart that he didn’t doubt.
Why is he forgetting her when he wants her with his whole body?
Why can’t he face tomorrow with the same heart he has today?
He rolled up the parchment, put it in a drawer, and locked it with his magic.
so that no one else can see it.
When will he be able to discover it and read it?
He wasn’t sure, but he was sure the day would come when he would open this up.
Just as he realized today, the day will come when he will realize it again.
He wanted to run right away and whisper his heart to her, but he couldn’t. He wondered if he deserved to confess because he will soon forget.
He knew that the only thing he can do now is to write down his feelings to inform himself someday.
There is nothing wrong with what Halbert said. Edlade didn’t want to hurt her.
He had no right to confide his feelings for her when she was going to be a stranger to him the next day.
Still, his heart was pounding, as if it was good to realize.
‘Isn’t it good just thinking about it?’
His heart cried contrary to the mind that couldn’t remember.
That’s right.,
It’s good to be able to express his love for her.
He wanted to do that all the time.
****
It was when I lay down on the bed after taking my bath that my clarity came back.
“A miracle….. It’s a miracle.”
It was me who was grinning just by recalling it.
Then he asked for the last dance of the spring flower ball with ecstatically sweet words.
His dance was more unstoppable than I remembered.
It was not so different from what I was familiar with, the firm forearm that wrapped around my waist and the wide chest that I held in my arms, which had slipped and fell due to tension.
“I think my heart is going to pop out.”
It was literally what I mumbled.
It was a dance that I danced, many times with Edlade, who loved me.
The Spring Flower ball was the first and last to be attended immediately after the wedding, but they were the only people who danced at the ball they had attended together.
I’d be lying if I said I didn’t expect it.
We went to the ball together in a carriage and thought I was abandoned, but when I saw him returning, I secretly expected the dance.
I wondered if he would dance with me.
Even if it wasn’t the last dance, there was a desire to dance at least once.
I desperately wanted him in a different sense from the moment he whispered in my ear as if seducing her.
I fingered myself for not having a conscience, but it was good.
What can I do when it’s good?
“Ee hee.”
I couldn’t hide and burst into laughter. Just by coming this far, I thought my facial muscles were being ripped off to manage my facial expressions.
Fortunately, Edlade doesn’t care about me.
Thanks to this, I was able to return to the mansion without being caught. It was also a bonus to see him glancing at me.
I performed his last dance with Edlade at the Spring Flower Ball. So there will be no way that I will be ignored openly in society in the future.
The socialites won’t be able to say anything in the future.
At least they can’t do it outright.
The perception has changed to the extent that Duke Philémon ‘cares about his wife,’ who is a political marriage partner.
“Uh-huh.”
I was literally as interested as an ant’s antennae.
No, it must have been Halbert’s request.
That alone made me happy.
Wearing a blanket all over my head, I fell asleep after a long time.
****
“It’s all about My Lady!”
“Really?”
“Yes! I have to go out when you get this kind of attention…”
Lasha looked at me.
It wasn’t because I liked to be lively and playful. To give power to the words, it was good to show them directly.
It was helpful for social activities in the future, so they seemed to want to go out with me even more.
“It has been three days already. You should go out once around this time and show the dignity of the Duchess.”
Noy, who was preparing the coffee, also said.
“My Lady is a workaholic. Please leave the work to me and go out and play.”
I said with a smile at the slightly dissatisfied remark.
“Let’s just leave this as it is”.
“……. Finding a house cleaner! I can do it, too.”
Noi sighed when I glanced through the documents as he placed the teacup in front of me.
“Please go out today. You said that the ‘Cheonrang’ people are coming back next week? Then, My Lady will have a lot of work to do, so I will take care of such miscellaneous work.”
“Ummm!?”
“Please.”
I laughed awkwardly seeing Noi begging for work.
The fact that she, her assistant, was free meant that I will have a lot of work to deal with.
‘Did he take away my work?’
Or else he might be thrown out for being useless.
Nodding lightly, I handed him the bundle of papers I was looking at.
“Then I’ll ask you, Noi.”
“Please, this is my job!”
It was cute the way he hugged the bundle of documents tightly in his arms as if he was moved was quite different from his first impression.
Lasha said, stomping her feet.
“Then are you going out today?”
“Well……”
I heard that there is a really good cake shop in the downtown area. My Lady, do you like desserts……”
“Then let’s go.”
Smiling broadly, Lasha said that she would get everything ready for their outing, and hurried out.
It was an act to leave no room for me to change my words.
‘Did I just stay in the mansion too much?’
I’ve been thinking about it, but in my past life, I’ve been living in a mansion more than I do now.
Because of the disgrace at the spring flower ball, I haven’t been outside for nearly a year. But now it is different from then, so I thought it would be good to change my mood by going to places I wanted to visit.
It was thanks to the dream-like time at the ball that I was able to relax my mind a little.
‘I need to go there when I’m out.’
Marquis Rayburn was running several businesses.
After taking in Archduke Buffken’s sister as his marchioness, the business flourished even further, gained confidence, and extended its reach.
One of them was a clover top.
Externally, it was only known as a shop that was built by an unnamed fallen nobleman. But inside, it was an information guild that bought and sold information.
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The clover top was now small, but it later became one of the best tops in the empire.
It meant that they had information that no one could get.
‘Most of the Rayburn family’s growth was from the Clover Top.’
Ability and skill were symbols of power, and money makes it possible to maintain power. The Rayburn family pressured Edlade by earning a fortune from the Clover shop.
“I can’t be beaten.”