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The Greatest Secret Agent of All Time - Chapter 51

Translator: Nyoi-Bo Studio  Editor: Nyoi-Bo Studio

Ning Qing was momentarily dumbfounded when she read the inelegant poem. She then read through the poem again repeatedly.

 She paid the most attention to the last line. The words were very faint at first, but the color of the words grew deeper as time passed.

 “Mistress, I’ll go and send him away. Do you have any words that you want to relay?” Ning Que asked.

 Ning Qing had never been friendly to people of noble status. However, she always looked sweet and friendly toward the commoners.

 She would always give her comments whenever a student handed her their poem, no matter how badly it had been written.

 “Mistress?” Ning Que reminded her once again.

 Ning Qing said, “Go and get him to come in.”

 Ning Que could not help but be alarmed. Why… Why would she want to do that?

 Ning Que had never met anyone in the past, no matter how influential they were. She even declined to meet the person who sent over Mister Taia’s treasured calligraphy just now.

 Now she wanted to meet a beggar?

 Could that beggar have written a poem that would shock the world?

 Should she do this even if that was the case?

 This was a unique time. The mistress should not be receiving the beggar no matter how good the poem he wrote was.

 She had to avoid doing things that would arouse suspicion.

 “Mistress, are you sure?” Ning Que asked.

 “I’m sure. Let him come in,” Ning Qing replied.

 “Alright!” Ning Que said.

 ***

 At that moment, at the peak of a mountain not far away, a group of people was waiting for a result.

 They were waiting for the beggar, Yun AoTian, to be immediately thrown out from the castle.

 An aide from the Valley of Torn Gust said, “All of you, get ready. Do not let the beggar, Yun AoTian, return to the peak of the mountain when he gets thrown out. Do not let him meet the lord again. Execute him immediately. A person like this will definitely become a disaster for the Valley of Torn Gust. For the foundation of our lord, we have to kill this lunatic for the Jing Clan.”

 “But what about the situation on the side of the lord?” a warrior asked uneasily.

 The aide replied, “Whatever we are doing now is for the ambition of our lord. The lord would never forgive Yun AoTian if he were to fail now and incite the wrath of Lady Ning Qing. It would instead sully the virtuous name of our master if we weren’t the ones to kill him.”

 The warrior was shocked momentarily. Their lord was as beautiful as a fairy, but he did not have a virtuous reputation. He was notorious for killing others.

 “Do you understand?” the aide said.

 “Yes!” The warrior said, “As long as Yun AoTian fails to ascend the mountain, we’ll immediately kill that wicked man for the lord.”

 The aide said, “Send someone to have a look. Has he been kicked out? Did he infuriate an investigation team? Do not let him escape. He might not rush back here.”

 “Yes!” The warrior descended the mountain to observe the situation.

 He sprinted back a moment later and said in shock, “Mister, mister, our brothers who were monitoring the situation under the mountain saw this. The beggar, Yun AoTian, has entered the castle. Lady Ning Qing has received him.”

 “Impossible…” the aide said in a raspy voice.

 “Impossible!” The Blue Immortal and Chu Zhaoran involuntarily exchanged shocked gazes.

 How was that possible?

 Ning Qing had refused everyone else. She would not open her door even for the treasured calligraphy of Mister Taia.

 Yet Yun Zhonghe was received even though he had entered the castle with nothing in hand?

 Why, why had this happened?

 What exactly happened? Had the sun risen in the west?

 ***

 A moment later!

 Yun Zhonghe appeared in the study of the widow, Ning Qing. He did not see Ning Qing, the woman who held the most authority and was hailed as the Legendary Talented Lady, through the screen.

 However, he detected the unique stench of blood when he entered the room. He was now even more clear of her judgment.

 “I pay my respects to Lady Ning.” Yun Zhonghe bowed and paid his respects. He then said, “Lady Ning must be very curious as to why I know all of this. It is actually very simple—”

 However, Yun Zhonghe had not finished his sentence when he was immediately stopped by Ning Qing. This woman was also very forceful.

 “What’s your name?” the widow, Ning Qing, asked.

 Her voice was melodious. There was determination mixed in with the softness.

 Yun Zhonghe replied in shock, “My name is Yun AoTian.”

 Ning Qing said, “What’s your identity?”

 Yun Zhonghe replied, “Valley of Torn Gust, an officer of the Embroidered Uniform Guards, third official registrar.”

 Ning Qing continued, “What’s your background?”

 Yun Zhonghe answered, “Beggar. I was born a hooligan.”

 Ning Qing asked, “Have you received an education?”

 Yun Zhonghe replied, “I studied for a few months when I was five. I dropped out during my first year of kindergarten.”

 “Then how did you enter the third official registrar of the Embroidered Uniform Guards at the Valley of Torn Gust? Has Jing Zhongyue taken a liking to you?” Ning Qing asked.

 Yun Zhonghe replied, “That’s because I have a special talent. I achieve results every time.”

 “What talent?” Ning Qing asked.

 “Coaxing and lying to girls, cheating them out of their fortunes and bodies. Guaranteed results,” Yun Zhonghe answered.

 Ning Que, who was by the side, swallowed when she heard those words. She wanted to vomit.

 A ploy of seduction?

 Jing Zhongyue had sent such an old, ugly beggar to seduce the mistress?

 How long had it been since he last washed his hair? Even the fleas were about to jump out, weren’t they?

 How unique of a taste did she imagine the mistress to have?

 However, Ning Qing was not angered. Instead, she said, “Do you know what happened to the handsome, talented man Jing Zhongyue sent the other time?”

 Yun Zhonghe said, “I do. He became a eunuch.”

 Ning Qing said, “Then does she feel that I would not bear to take action if she sends an old beggar this time? Furthermore, you might not be that old. You speak so bluntly. Are you not afraid that I would turn you into a eunuch?”

 Yun Zhonghe said, “My parents have told me since I was young that I should be honest and that I must not lie.”

 Ning Qing said, “What are your parents working as? Are they also beggars?”

 Yun Zhonghe replied, “I lost my parents at a young age.”

 The joke was lame to the point that Ning Qing could not help but shrug.

 “At this point, should I laugh a little to complement your joke?” Ning Qing asked.

 Yun Zhonghe said, “It’d be best if you could.”

 Ning Qing opened her petite mouth and let out two very official-sounding laughs.

 “Yun AoTian, do you know why I received you?” Ning Qing asked, “Other than the fact that you said that I have been poisoned by someone.”

 Yun Zhonghe said, “You must feel indignant.”

 “That’s right, indignant. It might even be fury,” Ning Qing said. “I’ve seen many students, as well as many people, who never received much of an education. Over the years, there have been at least a thousand people who have submitted their poems to me. Honestly, many people wrote poems that were worse than yours, but every one of them had presented their best works. Some of these poems were extremely bad, some coquettish, others incredibly hypocritical. However, at the very least, they made use of all of their talent. No matter how pretentious their poems were, I could see their respect and passion for poetry. However, I could not see any respect in your poem. You are mocking literature. You are taking the poetic verses lightly. That made me very angry.”

 “I can apologize. I was wrong. I was truly wrong.” Yun Zhonghe apologized immediately.

 “Your apology is the same as your attitude toward poems. Frivolous, without an ounce of respect,” Ning Qing said. “I am even angrier now.”

 The mature yet beautiful lady in front of him was very interesting. She was still extremely calm, even when she said that she was very angry.

 Her elegance and cultivation seemed to be etched into her soul and bones.

 At that moment, Yun Zhonghe noticed that the lady’s lips seemed to be growing increasingly purple. Then, a streak of blood flowed down from her nostril.

 “Lady Ning Qing, you must receive treatment as soon as possible,” Yun Zhonghe said. “What did you eat just now?”

 “No, that’s not important,” Ning Qing said. “I only care about two things in my life. First, my image. Second, literature and poetry. Your guess was right. I am not willing to see anyone because I am in an inelegant state. That’s why I am unwilling to see anyone.”

 Yun Zhonghe said, “Lady Ning Qing, your condition is extremely critical. You have to be treated immediately.”

 “No…” Ning Qing said, “I do not care whether I die or not. But you mocked poetry and took literature lightly. I am very dissatisfied with your disrespectful attitude. I am very angry. I am furious.”

 “Yun AoTian, I am angry. Attitude is very important,” Ning Qing said. “I might be a talented lady, as well as an elegant lady, but more so, I am an extreme lady. So… You have to pay the price for your frivolity! Ning Que, prepare…”

 The female warrior standing to the side, Ning Que, fiercely pulled out her sword when Ning Qing said those words.

 “The handsome man sent by Jing Zhongyue previously flirted with me with flippant words. That, to me, was a great humiliation,” Ning Qing said, “So I turned him into a eunuch. However, your frivolous attitude toward literature and poetry is an even greater humiliation. For that, I am going to neuter you and send you back to Jing Zhongyue.”

 The female warrior, Ning Que, immediately placed her blade under Yun Zhonghe’s abdomen without saying a word.

 There would be another eunuch by Jing Zhongyue’s side if the blade were to move downward.

 Yun Zhonghe felt his scalp turn numb.

 He realized that the woman before him, Ning Qing, was frighteningly stubborn. She was also a little mentally unsound.

 What was going on?

 Were all of the top-notch beauties of this world a little mentally unstable?

 Jing Zhongyue was like this. Ning Qing was like this. Even I, Yun Zhonghe, am like this.

 Did a person become crazier the more attractive they were?

 Ning Qing said, “Yun AoTian, I do not care how you are going to convince me, nor do I care about what you wish to obtain from me. I don’t even care if you are trying to save my life. We will speak after you pass the hurdle before you. You have to compensate for the poetry that you mocked with your frivolous attitude. Do you know the only one who can truly mock poetry?”

 Yun Zhonghe said, “The Poetry Genius!”

 “That’s right!” Ning Qing said, “Only a rare Poetry Genius can mock poetry as he would have possessed poetry. It is the same as how you can freely mock a woman when you are in a relationship with her, while mocking a woman you do not know will get you neutered.”

 Yun Zhonghe confirmed it. The widow in front of him was definitely insane.

 Ning Qing continued, saying, “The inelegant poem you wrote just now was unfit to be read. It was flippant and disgusting to the extreme.”

 “Every month, a few days of intense abdominal pain.

 Blood, an unending flow that dyed the dress red. You cannot meet anyone for half a month.

 A head of hair, shedding every day, too embarrassed to see anyone.

 Difficult troubles that you cannot voice, don’t worry, the holy hand of gynecology is here to help.”

 Ning Qing finished reciting the vulgar sentences, not even fit to be called a poem.

 “This poem has four lines. The words that start every line are ‘every,”blood,”a,’ and ‘difficult’!”

 “Use these words as your opener and make another poem that consists of four lines. You can use words that sound the same. However, you have to impress me completely. You have to surpass all of the poems that I have received in the past.”

 Yun Zhonghe froze at that moment.

 The widow, Ning Qing, continued, saying, “That will prove that you are a one-in-a-million Poetry Genius. It will prove that you have the right to mock poetry and literature. That way, I will be able to forgive you, and we can continue. Otherwise, I am going to neuter you.

 “You only have a limited amount of time. You have to complete your poem by the time I finish my countdown. Otherwise, you can peacefully become Jing Zhongyue’s eunuch.

 “Ten… Nine… Eight…”

 Ning Qing started her countdown. She took an average of five seconds between every number.

 Yun Zhonghe’s scalp truly began to turn numb.

 F… F… F*ck!

 Ning Qing was truly a devil. Was she really insane?

 “I already told you that I was an uneducated hooligan. I dropped out of school in the first year of kindergarten, and you expect me to compose a poem?” he thought.

 “Aren’t you leaving me with no choice?

 “Furthermore, you expect me to start with the words ‘every,”blood,”a,’ and ‘difficult.’ Even though I could use similar-sounding words, the poem has to be one-in-a-million. Isn’t this harder than reaching the sky?

 “I don’t even have a place to copy the poem from, do I?”

 Also, blood was continuously flowing out of her beautiful nose.

 Her breathing was getting more and more rapid, her lips more and more purple. Her condition was becoming more and more serious.

 Ning Que’s blade below Yun Zhonghe’s abdomen was raring to go. It was ready to strike at any time. Ning Que was going to turn Yun Zhonghe into a eunuch before immediately turning to save her mistress.

 “Seven, six, five, four…”

 Ning Qing’s countdown was about to end. Yun Zhonghe was about to become a eunuch.

 Yun Zhonghe trembled. All of the hairs on his body stood up.

 He closed his eyes and racked his brain.

 “Three, two, one…”

 The countdown was about to end.

 Yun Zhonghe opened his eyes fiercely and said, “Got it. I got it.”

 He then recited a poem with the required word at the start of every sentence. The poem read:

 “There are goodbyes as the blossoms move west. There is sorrow as the snow travels up north.

 I will always be a man of the mountains. Unable to obtain a comforting hug from my descendants.”[1]

 (Adapted and modified from the famous work of a Tang Dynasty poet, Zhang Nanshi)*

 ***

 [1] The words used at the start of the sentences of the second poem are similar sounding words to those of the first poem in Chinese.

 *Author’s note.

 

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