Chapter 15
Knock. Knock.
Early in the morning, Rosha gently tapped on the door of Joshua’s room.
There was a very long time of hesitation before she knocked on the door of this room. Even though she had made a mistake, she could not easily apologize because of her pride. The Rostelier brothers adored this stubborn young wizard, so the majority backed down.
This time, however, the child Rosha had mistreated was a 10 years old boy, five years younger than her. On top of that, it would be difficult to perform any more missions unless the relationship with this child was resolved regardless of the fault.
“Joshua, it’s me.”
As she approached the door, Rosha quietly called Joshua’s name.
“Are you awake?”
Although she didn’t hear the voice, Rosha felt confident that Joshua was awake.
“I’m coming in.”
Rosha opened the door without the room’s owner’s permission. As expected, Joshua was awake. Still cloaked in fear, Joshua avoided Rosha’s eyes with tearful eyes.
If she couldn’t loosen that boy’s heart strings, she wouldn’t be able to watch him and observe and consult with him. If that happened, she may be excluded from this mission and have to leave the search for Lily to others.
In order to find Lily, she had to make the boy feel better.
“Joshua….”
Rosha made up a soft, awkward voice and approached slowly. As soon as she was close to the bedside, she slowly bent her knees and looked at the boy.
“You were surprised to see me come in so suddenly, weren’t you?”
The end of her voice trembled as she had never used such soft words before, but Rosha tried her best to act like a perfect adult who had never been angry at all as she thought of how Noah had treated her.
‘You know what, Joshua?”
“…….”
“Yesterday, I…..”
“You don’t have to force yourself to apologize.”
Joshua cut her off, and Rosha looked at the boy with some discomfort. She still had the same awkward smile on her lips, of course.
“You don’t feel sorry for me.”
The boy, who had been friendly to Rosha since their first encounter, glared at her with a hurt expression.
Rosha, who was terrible at relationships, didn’t know how to approach someone who had come to hate her. Rosha scratched her palms with her nails in frustration.
“I was adopted since I was a child. There was a phrase that I was told to the point of disgust the moment I could understand.”
At an age when the world must seem beautiful, the boy shuddered, his voice full of exasperation. It was a pitiful sight, and Rosha felt a faint sense of guilt, but the difficulty she was facing now took precedence over that.
“This baby we brought back from Beria. The monster must have planted a curse on that baby instead of preying on it!”
The moment she heard those words, Rosha’s heart pounded violently.
“I was a survivor, but to the humans, I’m a cursed child that the monster had saved for a reason.”
It was because she remembered the similarities between Joshua and Lily that hadn’t occurred to her before.
Joshua and Lily, both survivors of the demon, both orphans who had lost their parents, were the same age.
Of course, Joshua was adopted by the Count’s family and became a nobleman, but according to Joshua, he had heard not-so-nice things after being adopted because he survived the demons.
So, what about Lily?
Joshua, who was adopted by the Count, also lived to hear such things, but Lily, who had no one to rely on, would also live to hear even more words.
“Every day….every time it looks weird. …… Every time someone dies……”
“…….”
“I feel like I’m really a cursed child….”
“Joshua…….”
“I thought Rosha was different……”
The guilt in Rosha’s heart doubled the moment she started putting Joshua and her sister together.
“Because out of all the many illusions the shadows have shown me, Rosha is the only one who has cried for me…so I thought I could open up to Rosha……”
“…….”
“And Rosha called me a monster, it’s terrible…..”
The sadness Joshua was spitting out was like Lily’s.
“That day …… I should have died too…….” (Joshua )
“I should have died that day, too.” (Lily)
“…….”
Lily’s voice overlaid Joshua’s.
“Rocha, I’m scared too. People pointing their fingers at me, and I hear strange illusions and voices…….” ( Joshua)
“Sister, I’m scared too. People are pointing their fingers at me. I keep seeing monsters….” (Lily)
“Why did Rosha come to see me?” (Joshua)
“Why can’t sister find me?” (Lily)
“If you hate me this much….” (Joshua)
“Is it because you’re happy without me?” (Lily)
“No, it’s not!”
Rosha involuntarily raised her voice, denying Lily’s words. Hugging the little blonde girl staring up at her with surprised eyes, Rosha constantly whispered, hoping that Lily’s broken heart would be relieved.
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. It’s not like that… I came very late, didn’t I? I’m really sorry…..”
How could I have been happy without you? It’s not like that, Lily. There’s never been a day when I didn’t think about you.
“I’ll never let people point fingers at you again. I’ll protect you from those monsters. I’ll do whatever it takes. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…….”
“Rosha…?”
“…….”
Rosha slumped as she heard a beautiful voice, slightly different from Lily’s.
Lily’s hair, which had been blonde earlier, had turned back to silver. In her arms, she saw not her sister Lily, but a boy of Lily’s age.
She was mistaken. She thought that the situation this child was facing might have been Lily’s situation, so she lost her reason and mistook Joshua for her younger sister.
The hand that was holding Joshua trembled.
“Ro, Rosha…”
Joshua called out to Rosha in a voice of concern and anxiety.
For some reason, Rosha couldn’t bring herself to untie the arms that held the boy. Maybe it was the fact that she had mistaken him for Lily for a moment, but it weakened her feelings for Joshua.
“I apologize.”
At the same time, this was an opportunity. This was het only chance to make up with this fickle boy.
“As a matter of fact, I have a younger sister the same age as you.”
‘In order to win a person’s heart, it is good to expose one of your weaknesses.’
Remembering Noah’s teachings, Rosha carefully told Joshua what had happened.
“There was a demon attack on our village, my entire family died and I was separated from my sister, not knowing if she was alive or dead. However, I finally began to hear of my sister.”
“Have you found your sister?”
“…… No.”
Rosha stroked Joshua’s head and smiled bitterly.
“She disappeared before I came to see her.”
“…….”
“I heard the news yesterday.”
Listening intently to the story, Joshua’s eyes, which had stopped crying, twitched again, and he grabbed Rosha’s collar and bowed his head.
“It must have been hard for you…”
Seeing the boy empathizing with the pitiful story of another person, Rosha felt heavy about bringing up his story to this child intentionally. However, she did not stop talking.
“I treated you badly, I really suspected you, and I just……. It was just frustrating and I took it out on you….”
“…….”
“I’m so sorry. It won’t happen again.”
“…… Yes.”
“Will you forgive me?”
Rosha apologized as she looked into Joshua’s eyes. Joshua opened his eyes wide and didn’t open his mouth easily. It was when Rosha began to feel nervous because she was afraid that this child would not accept her apology.
“From the beginning, I’ve never hated Rosha……”
Fortunately, the boy forgave Rosha easily.
Such an innocent child was pitiful, unfortunate, and cute made Rosha laugh in vain.
Joshua looked at Rosha like that, and carefully began to speak again.
“I’m fine…how about Rosha?”
“Me? Why me?”
“Rosha is….”
Joshua asked Rosha with teary eyes again, as if he had experienced something sad.
“Are you feeling okay, Rosha?
It was a question that no one had ever asked Rosha.
Everyone took pity on Rosha’s situation, but no one cried for her.
“I……”
She opened her mouth to answer Joshua firmly, but no words came out easily. It was then that she felt a small warmth on the back of her hand.
Joshua held Rosha’s hand.
Why? She hadn’t shed a single tear since she was little. Occasionally, she cried alone in her room, screaming, when she couldn’t help her resentment towards the demons, or when she dreamt about the night her family died, or at night when she was worried about Lily who was alone.
But that was also when she was very young.
Rosha had to grow up fast. When other kids her age were complaining about their parents and going to school, Rosha learned how to fight against evil.
All her brothers adored Rosha, but she learned that there was a degree to which she could rely on them to complain, because they weren’t her real family. In order to become a perfect member of the Golden Dawn Society, she had to learn about the different types of demons and what kind of group Babel was that wanted to rule the world. In the midst of all this, Rosha had to study at the headquarters at a very young age and complete her higher education, because her intellectual level should not be inferior.
It was bearable.
This much was nothing. She had already experienced the really hard part before.
She still felt sorry for her sister and her heart ached, but she didn’t feel like it was hard. In fact, she didn’t even have time to think about how hard it was because she was so busy. Naturally, Rosha’s tear glands dried up day by day.
Now, however, she felt like crying again, just like that childhood day.
The boy, who was much shorter than her, patted her lightly on the back of her hand.
“Don’t cry, Rosha.”
Joshua made it sound like Rosha was crying, even though she wasn’t really crying. But his words made Rosha really shed a tear.
She felt as if she had received warm comfort.
But it was a feeling that was all too unfamiliar to Rosha. She didn’t know how to unburden herself, even for a moment, at someone’s comfort. After awkwardly avoiding the boy’s hand, Rosha turned away from him, keeping both eyes open to prevent the tears that were already welling up in her eyes from falling.
Then, when she was about to leave the room, she hesitantly kept her grip on the doorknob.
“Hey, Joshua.”
“Yes.”
“If you don’t mind …”
Rosha exhaled long enough to catch her breath.
‘It’s okay, it’s a mission. I can’t let him leave my side.’
“I’m going to the orphanage where my sister was, do you want to go with me?”
This did not mean that she would give her side to the boy. She told herself.
However, Joshua seemed to be happy despite whatever Rosha was feeling.
The boy got off the bed with the blanket wrapped around him, ran to Rosha with his little two feet, and hugged Rosha with his small arms. All he had was a bright smile on his face.
Rosha’s heart grew heavy at the sight of the innocent face.
***
It was the Angel Orphanage, a place where lovely, poor children were abandoned.
The beautiful building had a deep basement. Down the dimly lit stairs, there was a prayer room with a faint red light leaking from its depth.
Today, the prayer room echoed with the earnest prayers of the director, who was always devoted to the service of the god.
“O God, forgive them their sins today.
Your foolish children…
Stay away from the darkness and chase the light.
They keep away from pleasures in order to live a clean life.
Give them goodness so that they will not be corrupted.
They reject the darkness.
They create sin and evil by worshipping false gods.
Use the flesh of your sinful children.
Shed their skin.
Pile up their bones and paint them with blood.
Build a tower that reaches to the heavens.
As such, may their sins be forgiven.
The day you climb up the tower to heaven.
And next to you is the one who embraces the sins of the earth.
Your children will accompany you.
Your followers, the ones who built the tower.
Will look up to you from underground.
On that day, the sun in the sky will be hidden by the moon.
The moon at night will be blocked by the sun.
All the light in the world will be extinguished.
A perfect darkness will descend on this earth.
God.
Will you punish all the people who have sinned against you?
Will you do that?
So, our great God, do nothing.
Just reign in the sky.”
The prayer eventually turned into a hymn.
“Darkness descends on the world.
Those who have sinned will not be able to see what lies ahead.
Listen, you sinners who believe in false gods.
You will not be able to look forward.
You won’t be able to see your family being separated before your eyes.
You won’t even know that your eyes are pulled out.
You believe in and worship false gods.
The ones who sell fake shoes to feed their bellies.
Those who have chosen evil and asked for forgiveness from false gods.
All of them will not be able to see what lies ahead.
The day darkness came into the world.
Only those who stand at the Tower of Babel will be able to see forward.”
It was a song with a cheerful melody, but the lyrics were not. The blood flowing from the woman’s arms formed a bright red formation on the floor around her.
As the song moved towards its climax, the color of the magic circle on the floor became increasingly darker and more purple.
The child who was watching through a crack in the door gasped quietly. It was always a bizarre and terrifying sight. The child, who had something to inform, but did not have the confidence to call the director, retreated.
“Ugh….”
The child’s plan to leave quietly was ruined. The child, who was stepping back, stepped on the wrong foot and fell on the floor.
Squeak!
The door opened completely and the child made eye contact with the Director. The head of the director, who was sitting there looking at the inverted cross on the wall, turned completely towards the child.
“Ha!”
The child covered his mouth.
“If you scream, you will have to spend some time in penance!”
The Director said that screaming during the holy time of praying to the real God to the children is fear of God and must be repented. Fearing the penitential time hanging upside down on a rope, the child stifled the scream that escaped his mouth. The director left the frightened child and turned her head again, touching her bleeding arm with her hand. The bleeding stopped and the wound disappeared.
After organizing her clothes, the Director approached the child who was sitting on the floor and gently offered her hand. The child held the Director’s hand with a trembling hand and rose from his seat.
“Good boy, you don’t fear God anymore.”
“I’ll go, thank you.”
“Alright. Hey, kid. You must have had a good reason for coming to see me at this hour, right?”
“It’s ……someone’s here…….”
“I didn’t think anyone’s visiting today.”
“It’s that pretty pink-haired lady who came in the other day.”
“Hmmm…….”
When the child finished, the Director sighed and rubbed her face with her hand.
She did not like the girl’s visit. The child added a few more words.
“This time she came with someone else.”
“Who is it?”
“It’s a boy with white hair, about our age.”
“…….”
As the child finished his words, his hands trembled at the Director’s increasingly bizarre expression. The face that had looked so annoying had immediately changed. The Director, whose mouth was gaping open, smiled and fixed her hair, which was once again neatly raised and tied.
“You go outside and pretend to play with the children.”
The Director, who gave the familiar instructions, patted the child on the head and left first. It was annoying to have her prayers interrupted, but since the visitor was special, the director was okay with today’s short prayer.
“I must welcome the guests.”
The child followed the Director.
The Director gladly went out onto the light-flooded ground to welcome the special visitor to Angel Orphanage.