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Oh My God! Earthlings are Insane! - Chapter 967

Translator: EndlessFantasy Translation Editor: EndlessFantasy Translation

In short, the original appearance of this medical room thousands of years ago should have been more advanced than a sterile ward of the highest level in Dragon City.

Now, it had become the place where witch doctors jumped to become gods.

In many primitive clans, witch doctors, priests, and shamans were the same thing. They were individuals with lofty statuses who could communicate with their ancestors and gods.

The witch doctors in this medical room were only responsible for treating the rat civil servants, and they had a lower status in the Turan civilization’s Shinto-like system.

They still wore three layers of colorful feathers on the inside and three layers on the outside.

They wore huge ebony and white bone masks.

Their necks, waists, and limbs were wrapped in shining gems.

They looked mysterious and unfathomable.

However, the thing that was embedded at the center of their masks and the bottle that was used to fill the powder on their waists made Meng Chao feel no awe at all.

If Meng Chao was not mistaken, the thing that was embedded at the center of their masks and acted as the “third eye” should be a full-screen phone.

The thing that was used to fill the powder and the liquid was a plastic soda bottle.

Of course, they were all ancient models from decades ago, or even from the Earth era.

The phone screen had long been shattered, revealing the circuit board inside.

Meng Chao estimated that these things were all from when Dragon City and Peach Blossom Town had just crossed over. The flood had spread from Peach Blossom Town along the Raging Tiger River, all the way past Guillotine and rushed to the Turan River in the middle and lower reaches. They were also fished up by the fishermen living at Picturesque Orchid Lake.

Perhaps, in the eyes of the Turan people, these were all gifts from the ancestral spirits.

No wonder the alliance between the Turan civilization and Dragon City civilization in his previous life was so straightforward.

Perhaps in the Turan people’s eyes, even the Earthlings were sent by the “sacred ancestral spirits” to help them fight against the Holy Light faction?

Two witch doctors waved two totem beast leg bones carved with exquisite patterns and danced around Meng Chao for a long time, muttering to themselves.

Forget Meng Chao, even the other Turan people probably could not understand what they were chanting.

Then, one of the witch doctors took out a bone needle and a cow tendon rope, gesturing for Meng Chao to stretch out his arm.

Meng Chao hesitated for a moment, and after confirming that the bone needle was not poisonous, he slowly stretched out his hand.

The other party first tied the cow tendon rope to the top of his elbow. After a while, he patted his forearm heavily.

Then, another witch doctor squeezed out a ointment that looked like cooling oil from the plastic soda bottle and smeared it on the spot that was slightly red after the first witch doctor patted him.

The first witch doctor easily brought the bone needle over and stabbed it in the air. He narrowed his eyes and waited for a few seconds before gently pressing Meng Chao’s elbow and performing another “pulling out the needle” action.

The familiar action stunned Meng Chao for a long time before he came to a realization.

Was this not a blood test!

That’s right. Since they were in the medical room, they naturally had to take a blood test first.

Although the Turan civilization was still in living a tribal lifestyle, they paid attention to science!

The problem was that the blood was drawn with a hollow needle, and there were rubber tubes and blood collection bottles behind it!

The two witch doctors pretended for a long time, but the bone needle did not even pierce the blood vessel. What use could it be?

Meng Chao ridiculed in his heart.

The two witch doctors were very serious and even pious.

They sent the bone needle, which had “collected blood,” to a bronze instrument with gorgeous patterns engraved on its outer shell and various gears and bearings embedded inside.

There were two observation holes on the instrument.

One of the witch doctors lowered his head and adjusted the gears next to the instrument, observing it attentively.

“Is… Is this a microscope?”

Meng Chao had an absurd hunch once again.

The other party’s movements and postures were indeed similar to “after collecting blood samples, sending them to a microscope-like instrument for analysis.”

However, Meng Chao was 100% sure that through the “microscope,” not even a hair of the bacteria could be seen!

It was not only because they had not truly collected his blood…

It was also because, no matter what civilization’s microscope it was, it was impossible to use a soda bottle cap as a cog!

“Therefore, this is not a real microscope, but… a piece of art that was randomly pieced together with countless crudely made parts to mimic the appearance of a microscope.”

The actions of the two witch doctors were obviously not real tests and treatments, but some kind of performance art.

Seeing the Minotaur witch doctor fiddling with the “microscope” for a long time with his short hands that looked like cow hoofs, Meng Chao finally could not help but ask in a low voice, “May I ask what you’re doing, Witch Doctor?”

The two witch doctors glanced at him in dissatisfaction.

Perhaps it was the shocking wounds on Meng Chao’s body that made them believe that he was a warrior who had received the protection of the ancestral spirit and was about to shine in the Battle of Glory.

Perhaps, they felt that there was no need to argue with a rat from a remote village who knew nothing at all.

Of course, it was more likely that the picture of Ice Storm tearing apart Poison Stinger’s One Million Steam Hammer with Mithril Ripper earlier had pierced into everyone’s heart like an icicle, making them shudder in fear.

One of the witch doctors dragged out his voice and shook his head. “Quiet, lowly rat. We are praying to the sacred ancestral spirit to grant you infinite strength to heal these insignificant wounds.”

It was obvious that the ritual of praying to the ancestral spirit was not something that could be completed with a simple “blood test.”

After waiting for a long time, the Minotaur witch doctor raised his head from the “microscope.”

Meng Chao was then sent to two strange-shaped devices by them.

The first one was probably an X-ray machine.

The second one was very similar to a large-scale MRI machine.

He was lying on a metal bed and pushed into a round cabin by two witch doctors.

Of course, like the “microscope,” these two medical devices were not real.

The surface was carved or naturally covered in mysterious and complicated patterns, and the witch doctors had dressed him up meticulously. It was inlaid with large number of colorful ores, while seven-colored feathers were glued to it with totem beast fat, and… a large number of totem beast skulls were even hanging down from the “MRI machine.”

However, these bits and pieces were not enough to make an equipment that was essentially a handicraft to have any medical effect.

The two witch doctors, on the other hand, were working very hard on it.

Seeing that they were covered in seven-colored feather clothes that were as thick as cotton jackets and they were sweating profusely, Meng Chao was somewhat moved.

“Negative!”

After the full set of examinations were done, each witch doctor shook a huge alligator snapping turtle shell, and a totem beast rib with a minus sign.

The two witch doctors were ecstatic. They shook the ribs at Meng Chao and shouted, “Negative, it’s negative!”

“…Lord Witch Doctor, so, what does negative mean?” Meng Chao asked carefully.

“Negative means that the ancestral spirit has heard our prayers and is willing to bestow supreme divine power on you, a lowly rat subject.”

“Your illness can be cured!” the two witch doctors said earnestly.

Meng Chao was speechless.

He suddenly had a feeling that he did not really want to be treated by the Turan witch doctors.

Fortunately, the secret medicine was genuine.

Moreover, it was even more concentrated than the secret medicine he had obtained from training a few days ago.

Meng Chao felt that he had been soaked in a large vat of dark green paste.

The spirit energy in the secret medicine was almost comparable to the Hell’s Blood that he had accidentally absorbed in the depths of the Lair!

Meng Chao could not help but moan in satisfaction.

Taking a deep breath, he immersed himself in the large medicine vat and enjoyed the feeling of being nourished by the secret medicine. He absorbed a crazy amount of spirit energy and repaired his damaged cells as well as spiritual veins.

At the same time, he quickly thought about everything he saw.

He had heard that there was “cargo worship” on Earth.

When the tribal aborigines living on remote islands accidentally discovered the cargo ships and transport planes of the civilized world, they would send all kinds of resources to the isolated islands.

They thought that the cargo ships and transport planes were envoys sent by the gods and could bring them inexhaustible resources.

After the cargo ships and transport planes of the civilized world left, the tribal aborigines tied branches and straw up into large ships and planes and worshipped them with perseverance. They believed that as long as they were devout enough, one day… the clay figurines would become gods and descend to the mortal world, once again giving them endless resources and supreme power.

“It is obvious that the Turan civilization’s prayer for the ancestral spirits is also a form of cargo worship.

“The ancestors or creators of the advanced orcs clearly possessed extraordinary civilization standards. They possessed all kinds of dark technologies, including advanced medical devices, large-scale military facilities, and super biochemical technology.

“Unfortunately, the long river of time impacted them. After thousands of years, their civilization collapsed and a huge fault appeared.

“Most of the dark technologies of the past were lost, leaving only the tribal natives who did not know what happened or why. They imitated the appearance of their ancestors and tried to awaken the power that had been dormant for thousands of years again…

“Wait a minute, there’s something weird here.

“If the Turan civilization, which used to be in control of super technology, has collapsed and degenerated into the tribal era, what about the secret medicine that I’m enjoying right now?

“Is it possible that the genetic medicine that’s even more advanced than the one in Dragon City can be extracted from the spirits and gods?

“Also, the totem armor combines the dual advantages of the nano combat suit and power armor. It also has magical self-repair ability and the ability to transform weapons to a certain extent. It’s such an advanced single-arm weapon system. Forget the research and development, is it even possible for a clan civilization to maintain and repair this system over thousands of years and still keep it as bright as new?”

Meng Chao felt more and more that the Turan civilization was not as simple as the orc clan on the surface.

Just as he was about to enter deep meditation and integrate all the information, he tried to grab more memory fragments from the depths of his brain.

He suddenly shivered and felt the temperature drop to below zero. The originally thick secret medicine was about to freeze into ice.

Meng Chao poked his head out of the water.

He discovered that the two witch doctors had already left the treatment room.

The treatment room had also turned into an ice cave.

The female snow leopard warrior’s eyes were wide open, and she had an unfriendly expression. She sat opposite the big medicine vat and looked at him covetously..

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