Chapter 1. So I became an Emperor.
The coronation was held in a grand manner. Since all were exhausted from the tyranny of the previous ruler, the people of the Seven Hills Empire welcomed the new emperor. Even the nobles were all welcoming.
Inside the banquet hall where a madman turned the palace into a sea of blood overnight with his insane killing power, no one was brave enough to show any signs of discomfort.
At the crowning ceremony where everyone cheered, only one person couldn’t laugh.
It was me – the new emperor, who became one by joking to my younger brother and now I’m torn apart.
As soon as I became an emperor, I was trapped in the grave of work which are waiting for its master. I put in the rest of my life just to get rid of the poop the Emperor had wrapped up.
At a young age, I became Countess Sutton, and had run the family twice, but it was my first time managing an empire.
Why is there no end to the piles of work?
Huh? Why is there no end?
It’s been like this. I decided to do it right and worked hard every day. But why isn’t it ending?
Huh? Why the hell?
I signed the paperwork tearfully and got up from my desk. I approached Edwin, who is lying on the sofa and eating grapes.
I grabbed my brother’s collar and shook him violently.
“Hey, can’t you see I’m busy? Don’t just play, you should work too.”
“But sister, if I work, many people will get in trouble.”
Edwin replied with grapes in his mouth.
What the former Count Sutton and now the current Commander of the Seven Hills Imperial Army, Edwin Sutton, said was true. There’s nothing else outside war to keep the Commander busy. And if a war broke out here, I will certainly die from overwork.
I threw Edwin’s collar and sat down on the couch. Edwin handed me a round grape and said with a cheerful voice.
“When sister became the emperor, everyone in the empire liked it. As expected, you must be destined to be the emperor.”1
“They would even like a dog to become an emperor if they can clean up after that fool emperor.”
“What do you mean even a dog? Sister is too humble. They say Seven Hills is already worth living just one season after sister rose to the throne.”
“Can’t you see your sister aged 3 years older in that one season? Hmm? Can’t you see?”
I asked while pinching both cheeks of my brother, who was talking bullshit, saying his sister is the best.
“Shister, huwts. Ich hurts.” (Sister, hurts. It hurts.)
Edwin screamed with a distorted face and forced my hand to let go.
He smiled at me with his cheeks turned red. I wonder if they heard why did this crazy bastard overthrow Seven Hills.
Ah, I cut the Emperor’s throat and put my sister on the throne. Now, I only suck honey and thinks about what to do next.
(T/N: 꿀만 빨면서 means to suck honey and is used to describe taking a rest.)
I stared at Edwin with a pathetic look, but he just rolled the grape in his mouth and laughed.
This guy is really a fool for his sister, but let’s admit it. I am also a fool for my troublesome brother, that even his messy figure looks cute too.
I pushed the fruit plate which Edwin put in front of me, towards him again, and said, “Eat a lot. You like grapes.”1
“You eat it too. It’s sweet and delicious.”
“Don’t eat the seeds. It hurts when you eat the seeds.”
“When did you not talk about it? My sister worries too much.”
Edwin gobbled up the grapes with a chuckle. When he was young, his body was very weak, and he got sick easily. Now, he can even chew a steel sword.
It would be nice if his mind is as healthy as his body. Why does a man raised with love turned into a lunatic?
There was a great deal of remorse.
In my past life, I didn’t take care of my brother.
When my father died, leaving the unborn Edwin, my mother, who was busy leading the family all by herself, passed away when I was 14 years old. Afterward, I only focused on managing the Sutton County that the two of them left behind.
(T/N: Edwin is a post-humous child, meaning their father died when he is still in their mother’s womb.)
I was young and had a lot to learn. I thought my younger brother would grow up well on his own. However, my brother left home as soon as he turned eighteen, and I never saw him again until I died at the age of 28.
What I regret the most when I closed my eyes is that I couldn’t take care of Edwin. I worried about where he was living until I breathed my last, but when I opened my eyes, I was once again fourteen.
So, the first thing I did was to take care of Edwin. I embraced my little brother, who was staring back at me, and lived as siblings who only relied on each other.
As if a reward for my affection, Edwin grew up bright and healthy.
Unlike in my past life, he made a name for himself as a swordsman genius. And without my knowledge, he became a notorious lunatic in Philland.
If I knew this would happen, I shouldn’t have told him to do whatever he wanted to do…
A plate full of peeled grape was placed in front of me, who is reminiscing the past with a dim face.
“Eat grapes, sister. I’m all done.”
Edwin grinned as he handed me a bunch of peeled grapes with his large hands.
The same pink hair that I have, scattered all over his forehead. I knew what my cute little brother, whose child-like face remained the same, was up to with that angelic face of his.
“Eddy. Why did you touch the Duke of Pagos again?”
“I’ve never done that.”
“I have a whole drawer of reports from the Imperial Inspector, and you’re going to lie to me? Do you want to get scolded?”
Edwin clicked his tongue for the first time and pouted his lips.
“They don’t approve of you. Don’t worry, Sister, I’ll throw them away and retrieve the Duchy.”
“Eddy. If you touch Duke Pagos, he’ll revolt with Duke Delmoy. Other Dukes will also be noisy.”
“You can just dispose all of them.”
“No.”
“Ah, why not?”
“What do you mean why, you crazy bastard. Less than a year has only passed since the Emperor changed. Are you going to start a civil war?”
“Even if we pretend we don’t know, they’re still going to kill us. It’s a must-win, sister.”
(T/N: Must-win, meaning is similar to do or die. Edwin is saying that if they don’t kill them, they will be the one who will be killed.)
I put a peeled grape into Edwin’s mouth, who was spouting nonsense. Edwin opened his mouth disgustingly, ate the grapes, and grinned.
I know the Duke of Pagos is uncomfortable with my ascension to the throne. It’s not just him. All of the four dukes expressed their discontent in their own way.
Seven Hills Empire.
It was made up of a union of seven families. But the three families, including the former Imperial Family Haldair who was smashed this time, have disappeared into history due to a battle over the imperial power.
The remaining four Dukes who were in charge of managing the North, the East, the West and the South, were not involved in political fights in the capital. However, they had a right to ascend the throne.
Suddenly, a new emperor was hailed from an unfamiliar county. Of course, it would be distasteful. If I do what Edwin said, a civil war may break out.
Oh, really. The terrible thing was the vassals. I still have too much work to do.
I shook my head firmly and said, “Your sister will try to figure out a way to persuade them. So, don’t get yourself involved, Eddy. This is a sincere warning.”
“Okay. If sister says so, I’ll stay quiet.”
“Please. Don’t do anything if possible.”
“Yes, yes.”
Edwin, nodded his head, giving an untrustworthy answer.
This son of a–, I think I have to add people to secretly follow him.
“By the way, I think sister’s calling must be to be an emperor.”
“Who would say such gibberish words?”
“You re-establish the Imperial Inspection Team in three months. I heard the head is quite stubborn.”
Don’t even talk, brother. It was really hard.
The former Inspector General, Cecil, went away with her men saying she couldn’t serve the emperor anymore, and the inspection team was dissolved. The inspection team, called the Emperor’s Eye, are not doing their jobs properly, and I need to know what the nobles are doing.
Thus, within two months, I managed to persuade Cecil by sending her letters every day. If I wrote a love letter with this sincerity, I think I would have been married three times.
Fortunately, the head of the inspection team was working hard as soon as she returned, making it a little easier to manage the empire.
Ah, no. It’s not easy at all, actually. What if the inspectors come to their senses?
In this palace, the crap of the previous emperor, who only play and eat, still roll around. From the grand chamberlain to the chief secretary, they’re all shitheads!
Just now, I signed the dismissal of the last remaining administrator.
The assistant secretary, who served as the chief secretary’s aide, seemed good so I appointed him as the chief secretary. I also decided to changed the grand chamberlain and promoted my butler, who had worked so hard from the Sutton County.
After changing the water for three months, it seems that the poop is gone. However, I’m short of people.
(T/N: She meant she’s been getting rid of the people who used to work for the previous emperor. Laviel referred to them as shit. I can’t stop laughing at her analogy.)
Those who want to work can’t stand the heavy workload and eventually resigned. I told them to choose between going home or going to jail, and they will lie down in pain.
Ha…I need people, people.
A man who is obedient, healthy, and won’t write his resignation. It would be nice if he could sign the document for me. I could just go to the morning political meeting.
No, I don’t want to see the whining nobles, so I think it would be nice if someone could go to the meeting instead.
Where can I find someone whom I can trust my job? If I could, I’d like to put a shackle around his neck and carry him around to work.1
I closed my heavy eyes and put my mind at ease.
Let’s get it together. I was pushed to become an emperor. However, I should not act as a tyrant.
There are a lot of people who work well and are healthy, but it is hard to find someone who won’t run away because it is difficult. I know well that giving a lot of money isn’t worth doing.
Even though I am the emperor of this vast empire. There are many times when I just want to smack my brother in the back and run away with the emperor’s crown.
I can’t really do the cuffs, so is there anything I can throw as a bait?
Ah…there is one.
“Eddy.”
“Why, sister?”
“I want to get married.”
“Huh? Suddenly?”
I smiled brightly and nodded. You’re not going to run away when your wife is the emperor, are you? You’ll die if you get caught.
All right. That’s a very good idea. I don’t know if it’s going to be one guy, so should I get a concubine?2
Four people, who are well-versed in each field. Just the thought of that seemed to take my breath away…