According to the sex education she recieved, a woman can have a painful experience when sleeping with a man she does not want.
‘Besides, Endimion doesn’t see me as a woman either.’
-I never felt it while thinking of the queen.
It happened three years ago, but Endimion definitely said that. Julia played with her fingers with a sulking face.
‘I was disappointed then for some reason, no! I just wanted to know out of curiosity.’
She had made a light personal investigation rather than a full-fledged investigation. However, since Endimion hasn’t gone out with anyone else it seems to be an unrequited love.
But it’s definitive that he doesn’t see her as a woman. Otherwise, how could he sleep with her every night, at such vigorous age, without laying a finger on her?
Julia certainly liked Endimion. He is her closest, most comfortable and reliable person. But she wasn’t sure if that was love towards the opposite sex.
‘Normally isn’t love between men and women a tingling sensation where your heart trembles?’
Currently, Endimion was her only family, a relationship more intimate and precious than with her own father.
“Ah, my head hurts.”
I don’t want to sleep with Endimion, but, as Miladi said, I don’t want to have it tough when I’m old.
‘Can’t I just feed Mion nutritious foods?’
Mion can just live long and die after I pass.
Julia believed that Endimion wasn’t someone who would break their marriage because they didn’t have any children.
Julia, who had been laughing at this idea, was startled out of her thoughts by someone running and wrapping their arms around her legs.
“Queen-nim!”
“……….Ed?”
A little brown head rubbed against her and said his greeting in a tongue-tied voice. Julia quickly lifted the child up upon hearing this familiar voice. The child grinned and clung to her neck.
“I greet my Queen-nim.”
A young woman with black hair approached Julia while she was smiling at Ed. It was Endimion’s half sister, Iris. She stood nearby, readily watching them.
“Oh, Duchess Hyde.”
Specifically, not Miladi’s but the former Queen’s daughter. Iris Hyde greeted her with a blunt face. Julia also answered with her eyes. An awkward atmosphere quickly formed.
Iris’ face was similar to Endimion, even though they had different mothers. So Julia wanted to be friends with her, but the atmosphere was awkward since their first meeting.
When Julia was 7 and Iris was 12, Iris had deliberately tried to avoid her since the beginning.
“You must be here to see mother.”
“Yes, as it’s been a long time since the Great Queen asked me to join her for dinner.”
Miladi seems to be pretty bored these days. Lunch with daughter-in-law and dinner with her stepdaughter.
Julia’s mother-in-law was very interested in her stepdaughter, but the two still had an uncomfortable relationship because Iris had always been shy. Compared to when we lived together in the royal palace, the two developed a closer relationship after Iris got married and left the palace.
“Ed, you’re giving the Queen a hard time. Come down now.”
“Ye, yes.”
The 5 year-old boy, Ed, climbed down from Julia’s arms with a sullen look on his face.
Julia, who liked his warm, soft touch, rubbed the disappointed child’s head. Iris, who was watching this without a word, said,
“I have something to tell you.”
“Yes?”
She sounded distant and polite, as though engaging with a stranger. Julia flinched and looked into Iris’ stoic gaze.
Then Iris seemed to take a deep breath, and soon recited her words as though she had memorized them.
“My husband is having a hard time keeping his majesty’s unsavory crowds in check. You only need to make one successor, how long do you plan on being noble? Do you not have the Queen’s duty if you have God’s favor?”
This was the one. The reason Julia thought of herself was a trophy.
‘I thought it was getting quiet, it’s happening again.’
Julia slowly narrowed her eyes, it was about childbearing again.
Iris had been cold, like this, since childhood. Even if it seemed like they had gotten a little closer at times, strangely, she became cold like a different person in a few days.
Just as if she didn’t want to get close to Julia.