Chapter 86 – Escaping the Bitterness
“Let’s go sometime soon. Then, we can have a proper lunch with the kids,” Tiana said.
“Of course.”
“But before then, I think there is something I need to do. Something so that we can have a fulfilling time with them.”
“What is it?” asked Lucius.
Tiana looked at him calmly and took a deep breath, as he waited patiently, not moving an inch.
“I want to start a social welfare business. Not just for those kids, but all kids in similar situations.”
“Does that mean you’ll be their sponsor?”
“For me personally, yes, but I want to expand it to a larger scale. At first, I will start by procuring and delivering relief supplies, but I want it to increase in size little by little and serve as a stepping stone for children to live through welfare projects.”
“If it becomes a ‘welfare project’ rather than general ‘welfare’, it will be necessary to explore profit margins. And if you make it a business, you’ll also need capital,” remarked Lucius.
“If I expand it into a business, there will be endless ways to pursue profits. My primary focus is supporting the children. But if I do involve sponsorship, I would like to develop a place to foster talented children,” Tiana replied.
“Hmm…” He rubbed his chin in thought. “Many children are still struggling to make ends meet due to their nationality and status. It would be a good welfare project if we could support such children and cultivate their talent into means of earning.”
Processing all that Tiana had said, Lucius nodded and squinted his eyes. An instant change in his eyes prompted her next thought. She slowly exhaled and continued, “I will need more initial capital than I thought. Speaking of that, can I ask another question?”
“Yes.”
“Uh… the internal budgets allocated to me… what made you give me that much?”
“Is it less than you wanted?” Lucius asked.
“No, not at all. In fact, it’s the opposite; it’s too much. I don’t have anything to use that much on. The money, what does it mean? I can use it anywhere at any time? It doesn’t matter?”
Tiana deliberately asked him bluntly. It was best not to skirt around this discussion. If they had good understanding, he would get the gist of what she wanted to ask. As she expected, maybe he would tell her the correct answer. Lucius grinned at her, waiting patiently for her to finish.
“Sure. That budget is for you and only you, money for you to do whatever it is that you want, whenever you want.”
“Then is it okay that I use it as the initial capital for my social welfare business?”
“Whatever, whenever you want.”
When she saw Lucius gladly answering as if he had been waiting to say it, she burst into a big grin, that she was sure took over her whole face making her look like a maniac, but she didn’t care. She was even more breathless when Lucius grabbed her by the waist and lifted her up in the air to seat her on his lap. She placed her hands on his chest and kissed him on the cheek.
“Thank you!” Tiana beamed.
“You don’t need to thank me. As a matter of fact, I had expected this. Well, not the size of the budget in anticipation of this kind of thing. That’s the money I had been accumulating, and I wanted to spend it only for you, but after this incident, I expected what you had been thinking.”
“How?”
“Because you didn’t leave those kids’ sides until the day we left. I watched you until the last day, and when Lona said she would take care of them, you looked sad. Because you couldn’t stay there and do it yourself, right?”
Her eyes lowered to a button on his shirt as he spoke. She had tried to hide her emotions from everyone that day, but she must have shown it all to him. While leaving the city she had thought about it over and over. Leaning forward towards him, her chin almost touching her chest, she let it all out.
“I felt so helpless… there was nothing I could do for the girl. She never left my mind… And I keep hearing her voice calling out to her brother. I even have dreams about it. I didn’t want to leave until she woke up so I could apologize to her, and tell her I am sorry for not being able to find her brother.”
She continued when Lucius’ hand came up from her waist to rest at the back of her bent neck.
“On the other hand, I was also afraid to see her because I don’t think the boy liked me being an aristocrat. I was scared that the girl, too, might not like me.”
At that his thumb extended from the back of her neck to below her chin to make her look up at him.
“That is not possible. Never.” He spoke with conviction, looking straight into her eyes.
“I sure do hope so,” she whispered.
She could feel Lucius’ need to console her, but Tiana couldn’t get rid of the bitterness in her heart. Considering the child who had lost her brother and was left alone, there was a possibility that she would think that way. She might even be blaming Tiana for not saving the boy.
“Tiana, if you hadn’t saved her, she wouldn’t have been alive right now. However it turns out, time will pass and the little girl will one day grow into a woman who appreciates what you did for her. You shouldn’t blame yourself for something not in your power.”
“Lucius…”
“I think you did everything that you could do for her. But if you want to do more, I will be by your side the whole way. I’ll help you. So you can escape that bitterness, no matter what.”
Smiling softly, he gently cupped her face in his hands and kissed her forehead, then he kissed both her cheeks and finally, his lips covered hers in a deep kiss.