Chapter 3
“…I, neither do I. I’m sorry your highness.” The maid’s face looked sullen as she apologized.
I let out a sigh and replied, “No, it’s fine.”
I guess I should have expected this.
Etricia was infamous for her arrogance, and her pride wouldn’t let her trust people with sensitive information about her own affairs. Even if she did, she still probably wouldn’t tell them the whole story, as much as possible, she’d try so hard to conceal her tracks.
Still, knowing her behavior doesn’t tell me anything about the identity of her child’s father.
Even the emperor, the father of Princess Etricia, didn’t know and didn’t ask me any further. However, I reckon that regardless if I tell him or not who the child’s father is, he will find him himself and tear that man’s body to shreds… at least, that’s what he told me.
Honestly, I too, want to cut off Princess Etricia’s baby’s daddy.
No matter the situation, how can one be so thoughtless and not use birth control!? That guy enjoyed it, yet why do I have to deal with the consequences!? Gosh, those two really saddled me with this responsibility didn’t they?!
“Uwaaah!” Once again, Etricia’s baby started crying, and her tantrums this time was seemingly more intense than before!
The more that I think about this situation, the more I feel that it is unfair for me to have this child and not know who the father is.
Even Etricia’s father is unnerved by his daughter and granddaughter’s current state. I could sense his growing restlessness and anxiousness with each passing day. I too was growing desperate to find the child’s father, but my reason for it is quite simple…
I want to leave the baby with her father.
After all, Etricia didn’t have this baby on her own, even the absentee father had a responsibility to the child. Furthermore, even though I technically birthed the child, she was not my baby. I didn’t have any confidence in myself to take care of her, so wouldn’t it be better to leave the four-month old baby with her true father?
I am certain her real father would love and care for her more than I could or ever will. I really think it would be better for her daughter to be sent off to live with her father in order to receive some true familial love, especially since Etricia is no longer around.
Since I am currently in Princess Etricia’s body, perhaps she had died?
Well, whether or not the real princess was still alive, I think she had a good life. She had both power and wealth and according to Bell, Etricia claims she has no regrets and even seemed to love her baby.
But I am not her, and I wasn’t ready to have children.
I don’t even know how I got here!
When I opened my eyes, I was already in a different world, and what’s worse, I am pretty sure there wasn’t a novel that begins with the birth of a child. Was there?!
Regardless, I was here, and I don’t think I will get out of here any time soon, if at all!
“Oh, I’m going to die!” I exclaimed in frustration as Etricia’s daughter wailed louder.
I groaned as I rocked her cradle grudgingly. If I had known that taking care of a child was such a tough job, I would have been nicer to my parents.
Soon the baby’s tears turned into laughter.
I wonder what makes her laugh so much?
This child could only do two things; cry and laugh. Perhaps, I shouldn’t be too critical, after all, what more could a baby do?
At first, I thought she was a quiet child, but then she always ended up crying whenever I wasn’t around her. I started to move away, but as expected, she started crying once again.
Just then Bell, who was standing near me spoke, “Princess, I think she’s looking for her mother.”
“Yes… It seems so.” I replied with a loud sigh.
This kid really…
When I’m with her, she doesn’t cry at all, but when I wasn’t there she would start crying right away. It was because of this that I eventually ended up having to sleep with the child in my room. I glanced down at the child who was looking back at me with her brilliant red eyes.
I grabbed her from her cradle and began wrapping my arms around her in a gentle embrace.
“When I look at you, it seems like you really look a lot like me.” I told her softly.
The baby’s golden blonde hair and ruby eyes were so similar to Etricia’s. I know if I were to go anywhere, everyone would beat me down if I started telling them she wasn’t my child.
The good news is that the baby and I have spent the whole day together, so we’ve gotten to know each other a bit better. I daresay, we’ve grown reasonably close.
“Who is your father, huh?” I asked the baby slightly in frustration. Anyone would think that I look crazy asking a baby about her father. But there was no one else I could talk to, and I didn’t have anyone to complain with so I couldn’t help but mumble to myself.
As I continued to rock her in my arms, I couldn’t help but also start to feel drowsy.
Admittedly, I wasn’t sleeping well because these days I had a hard time falling asleep. Still, even though I got thrust into an unplanned parenthood, I couldn’t help but notice that the child was rather smart. She always behaved well and always seemed to stare at people attentively.
Just then a maid entered the room and announced, “Your highness, His majesty is looking for you.”
I stood up from my seat and prepared to hand the baby to Bell, but as I prepared myself to do so, I glanced down at her and she met my gaze with her bright smile and blinking eyes.
She did look kind of cute.
“If I let you go, will you cry again?” As expected, the baby did not respond but seemed to grab at my hair as I began handing her to Bell.
Seeing this, Bell told me, “Yes, I think it would be better for you, your highness, to take her with you. She likes the princess so much that she doesn’t want to let you go.”
“Hah… I told you, you shouldn’t touch me like this.” I whispered to ‘my’ daughter.
I couldn’t help but look at the child, “Well, do you want to go too?”
I knew there was no way she was going to answer this question, but still her next actions made me think she understood me. She stretched out her hands and wiggled them at me and I found myself taking her back into my arms.
I think she wants a hug.
* * *
“Father, did you call me?” I greeted the King as I stepped inside his office.
As soon as he heard my voice, he raised his head up and his red blazing eyes focused on me, “You…” However, the fire in his eyes mellowed down when he spotted the baby in my arms, “…Oh, my granddaughter is with you.”
His angry expression changed into a broad smile and his mood visibly brightened. I guess it was a good idea to bring the baby with me, otherwise, I am sure he will start nagging me to no end.
My father started approaching me excitedly with his arms slightly raised. I breathed a huge sigh of relief and handed the baby to him. Thereafter, he started cooing at the baby in a disgustingly sweet voice, “How can you be so pretty? You get prettier every day.”
As much as I do not want to interrupt this grandfather-granddaughter moment, I needed to know why I was summoned, “Why did you call for me?”
The King suddenly looked at me with serious eyes, and said, “You know, I can’t keep referring to my grandchild like this. I keep calling her ‘you’. You’ve got to give her a name.”
Honestly, I couldn’t give her a name because it didn’t feel right. I couldn’t just callously decide on it, since it was something the real Etricia should do. If I do it in her stead, it would feel as though I am taking that privilege from her.
I know I had doubts that I will be able to get back to my world, but I still haven’t completely given up hope that one day I will. Therefore, I have been delaying naming the child all this time.
“How about…Rustina?” The King suggested and I gave him a confused look.
“…Why Rustina?”
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“Because it is a combination of Angel and Gratia (love).”
So… Angel love?
I began to wonder if that really was a good name for her?
Judging by the kid’s fair white skin and blonde hair that looked like golden threads spun by angels themselves, then I guess she does look like she came down from heaven.
It’s not a bad name.
As if she was voicing her approval the baby started to mumble, “Baaahhh…”
“You seem to like it.” Rustina grinned at my father’s words. Seeing my father and child interact together was actually pretty cool.
Still, even though Rustina always placated the King’s temper towards Etricia, I knew that I needed to work hard myself and earn his good graces.
I cleared my throat and asked apprehensively, “Are you angry with me? Because as soon as I stepped inside you started glaring at me.”
My father gave me a look of confusion that slowly faded into a contemplative look, “Hmm… that’s right, I am angry at you. But you will understand how I feel if you were in my position.”
He spoke solemnly, but his hand did not stay still for a moment. His gesticulations also became bigger with each passing second. All the while Rustina giggled as she also moved with my father’s animated swaying.
She looked delighted by his antics.
“Do you still not know who the child’s father is?” I asked.
“Hah! That’s exactly why I’m holding you here Etricia… they said there is a way to find out.”
“Really?”
This was the best news I have heard!
I did not dare hide my joy, and gleefully smiled.
However, I noticed that Rustina’s smiling face contorted and her expression visibly darkened. I wonder if she was about to cry? I looked at my daughter with anxious eyes, and just as I predicted, she burst into tears.
“Ugh, uwaaaaaah!”
“Don’t cry, peek-a-boo. Look at your grandpa’s face, isn’t he handsome?” I told her as I began making faces and pointing at her to make her look at the King. Seeing as it seemed like she wasn’t going to stop crying anytime soon, I went over to my father’s side and took her from him.
I began bouncing her lightly in my arms and asked the King, “…But, what does keeping me here have anything to do with finding Rustina’s dad?”
Rustina was still crying so badly that I tried to calm her down by patting her on the back, but to no avail.
“Why are you suddenly complaining about being confined in the palace? Is something the matter?”
I could sense the tension between me and my father building again. Due to our unanswered question, we couldn’t help but feel frustrated with each other whenever we talk. To clear the air between us I focused on running around the room and comforting the still crying child.
“So… what is the method you were talking about that will help us find out who Rustina’s father is?” Because Rustina was still heavily wailing, I figured that I needed to end this conversation soon and bring her back to my room. Therefore, I needed to hear that information quickly.
On the other hand, I noticed that my father also looked equally impatient with me and walked over towards where I was standing. He gave a quick glance at Rustina and told me, “That kid’s throat is going to hurt, she needs to stop crying before her vocal chords collapse.”
I gave him an exasperated look and replied, “Then please tell me quickly what it is because I am getting tired too.”
I really don’t understand why Rustina is acting this way. I thought she calmed down a bit after we’ve been together all day. I also made sure that she took her meals and changed her diapers so I really am perplexed as to why she’s behaving this erratically.
I turned my attention back to my father and tried to ignore Rustina’s discontented screams, “You said there was only one way, but that…”
“Uwaaaaaah!”
Before my father could answer, Rustina raised her voice even louder and wept. Realizing that her crying was just going to grow worse, I decided to cut this conversation short, “Father, I’ll hear about that later. I guess I’ll have to go to my room and comfort her first.”
Perhaps my child was getting sleepy, right?
So I hurriedly left the office and headed back to my room.
As we got further from the King’s office I noticed that the tears on Rustina’s face tickled down until she completely stopped crying. I looked down at her suspiciously while she stared back at me innocently; as if nothing had happened.
As I looked into Rustina’s eyes, I found myself smiling involuntarily.
You really are a weird baby, aren’t you?
“Aren’t you curious about your father too? It would be better for you to have a father.” I told her.
That’s right, she needed her real dad because I won’t be able to give her my heart completely.
I can’t love her…I can’t even figure out what she wants when she cries!
How can I be her mother if I’m like this?
“Ha…” A sigh escaped my lips.
Yes, what do I know? It’s a really strange situation.
“I will definitely find your dad.” I told her.
However, my words seemed to have only upset her more, “Ugh, ahhh.”
“Rustina?”
Didn’t she just react to the word ‘dad’? I tilted my head at her. It is obvious to me now that she reacted violently against hearing that word.
But isn’t it crazy to think that babies will be able to do that, right?
I decided to test her once more and said out loud, “…Dad?”
She started hiccupping, “Eubb.”
“Rustina, your father?”
“Oh, boo boo! Uhhh.”
Oh no…She looks like she’s about to cry…
Okay one last time, I took a deep breath and spat out the words with the same intensity the King had earlier when he spoke to me, “I will definitely find your father…?”
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“Uwaaaaah!”
Oh my gosh, is it possible? Do you not want us to look for your dad?
I looked at Rustina who was in my arms with a look of disbelief. As we were near my chambers, the maids started rushing out in the hallways as they heard her cries reverberating through the walls.
-To be continued.
Translator: Byoun
Editor: Nine Knight