“Haak… Haak…”
How far had she run? All Deertes could remember was the night sky had turned bright and the sun burning overhead.
Every step she took the bottom of her foot sunk. As if she was slowly getting sucked into the ground. The movement made a sliver of pain go up to her spine. Breathing hard, Deertes turned behind. The beasts that had previously attacked them at night were now slowly approaching behind her.
Taking one step forward, they took one as well. Deertes sometimes alternated between taking one step and two, making sure that the beasts did not catch up to her.
As if they were having a nice day out, the beasts sometimes played tricks on each other’s tails and ears, playfully biting themselves.
Deertes believed that the moment they got bored of such antics, they would lunge forward dozens of steps and bite her neck. The distance between her and death was merely a few dozens of steps away.
‘What happened to the others?’
She did not mean to worry about the other women but she wondered if the beasts had attacked them yet, whether they had been killed before going after her.
Now, thoughts about her family and Serene did not cross her mind. The only thing that filled Deertes’ head were thoughts of herself.
‘I don’t want to die.’
She thought so, even though she had once held a gun up to her chin.
‘I don’t want to die like this.’
She would rather pass on painlessly. She did not want to die at the hand of an animal in which she did not know the name of in a place where no one would know.
‘…I want to live.’
At that moment when that sentence crossed her mind, her knees buckled. Deertes’ body rolled down the hill as she lost her balance. She tried pushing herself up will the last of her strength but this was the end of it. There was no energy or power left in her to flee.
The beasts that trekked closely behind Deertes rushed forward, excited as they saw her who had fallen. The distance that she had kept between herself and death disappeared in a matter of seconds. Tears started flowing as Deertes thought of all her efforts have been in vain.
“…I want to live.”
The thought that Deertes dare not voice finally came out. Even though it was a voice that no one could hear or answer, she had to say it out.
“Deertes.”
There, a voice calling her name sounded. Thinking it was a part of an auditory hallucination, Deertes slowly turned back. The man who had saved her from death before throwing her back into death’s pit stood before her.
The moment she met his blue eyes, Deertes felt as if she was once again bound to his soul. Still, he was glaring at her with a hard to describe look.
Right, this must be hell. That must be why the devil came to pick me up.
“I will save your life.”
The devil spoke what she wanted to hear the most.
“So take a vow.”
And he spoke of what he wanted the most.
“In exchange for saving your life, you are to be mine until you take your last breath.”
Deertes now had something else to think about as she was chased by the beast. What would have happened if she too had been put up for auction? Perhaps she would have chosen someone.
And after she got out of the desert, she would have secured him with more status and money than he had originally thought, before being given the freedom to safely enter Bernst.
She might have been able to get to Bernst safely, but that man had stopped it all from happening. And now she was thrown away and left in this desert filled with roaming animals. Moreover, he did not say a word when he had left. So she was left to be chased by the beasts without knowing the reason why he did such a thing.
“…You’re going to save my life? You?”
A sneer escaped from her parched lips as she felt a burst of pain rise to her neck.
He had definitely left the other women to die but had approached and offered to save her life in exchange for a vow. At that thought, Deertes bit her lips.
‘This man has no idea what a vow is.’
A vow. It is a promise that has to be kept under the name of God and a promise of strength.
But, that was a long time ago. Now, it is far from the sacred age and it is now an era where God’s name does not hold as much glory as it used to.
The glory of God’s name was slowly lost the moment man started to fear guns more than lightning from the sky, from the moment there were more human cities than there were for God’s name, from the moment one man found out breaking God’s teachings can be easily prevented by simply drinking clean water, burning dirty bedding and the catching of killing of mice.
Priests had mentioned the reason vows began to lose power is because people lost faith. Still, many people instead believed that all dishonest and unclean things were a result of the breaking of vows. Soon, vows went beyond superstition and exercised stronger faith, becoming one of the strongest promises to the people.
The king had taken a vow to inherit the kingdom, and the nobles had taken a vow to inherit their families, and most people would take vows in marriage.
However, unlike men, women in Ramedes were only allowed to swear in God’s name once in their entire lives. With women there taking those vows when getting married, as if it were a given.
A vow to conform to her husband’s words, to obey him, and to protect her family while being a pure, quiet and wise wife. While other vows granted to women were those who pledged to dedicate their lives to serving God.
Until now, Deertes has yet to pledge herself to anyone. She had thought that such actions would occur in a cathedral in the capital one day, in Bernt’s church after having taken the boat to Saul.
She had thought that she would swear herself to Richard Fraser, her to-be-husband that the king had appointed, yet this man in front of her was asking for that vow.
‘There’s no way you know what value a vow holds to me.’
When she was young, her father had warned her that taking a vow is a once in a lifetime opportunity and to not swear it on a whim.
The forest fairy legend that is well-known among the people was actually missing a part. One time, Count Russell had called for Deertes to tell her of the hidden story.
“The reason why the forest fairy was unable to return to the forest until the first Count had died wasn’t because of love. It was because a vow had been taken. The greater a person is loved by God, the greater the power of a vow would hold. Serene is weak because of her vows. So, you should never take a dangerous vow. To respect the person who is to be your husband one day, you can take a moderately dangerous vow, but that’s about it. To prevent any problem from arising.”
Even though her father had told her all that, he had left out mentioning what Serene had made a vow on. He had only mentioned that Serene had been unaware and broke the vow that he had sworn in the cathedral. Whenever she saw Serene feeling unwell, after having heard her father’s words, Deertes took it to heart.
Yet, this man was asking for her to take a vow to be his until he takes his last breath.
‘I can’t do that.’
Then, her last option would be saying ‘no’. Yet, passion filled the eyes of the man who had asked her to vow to be his. She, who was praised as being the country’s most noble lady, was now asking to pledge her whole body and self to a man who was not the one appointed to her by the king.
At the same time, her instincts were yelling at her to quickly take the vow to save her life. After all, she had to pledge a vow to someone one day. The chosen one will not be the one she willingly chooses. So what is the difference between pledging a vow to Richard Fraser or to Cassar? Everything will end up useless when she dies anyway.
In order to survive, she had to listen to whatever Cassar wanted.
Unable to decide between logical reasoning and her instincts, Deertes turned to look at Cassar. Even though she was standing in front of him, all she could see was his blurry face.
Grrr.
Then, she picked up the low cry of the beasts. Perhaps it did not like Cassar’s sudden appearance. With that cry, images of death that she had encountered flashed through her mind as she wondered whether she too will follow in the footsteps of those deceased figures.
Having seen the beast’s face as it closed in, Deertes reached out towards Cassar. Although her injured shoulder screamed with every movement, she raised out her hand with all her might. Cassar walked forward, kneeling down on one knee and reached out his hand. Deertes placed her hand on his.
This is the way all vows are made. The one who asked for the vow and the one who accepts them. The back of the hand of the asker faces the ground while the acceptor’s faces the sky. It was a simple yet absolute action.
“…Save me.”
She could not remember the words that needed to be said when making a long vow, so all she said was the one thing that she desperately needed at this point in time. Despite saying that she will make the vow, Deertes thought to herself how lucky she was to only be alone with him.
Deertes remembered a young lady who had once met a robber and experienced a rough time. As the news caught traction, many people despised said woman for being one with ‘open legs’, and for being one who would rather abandon the pride of aristocracy to survive. Unable to handle such criticism, the young lady eventually took her own life. But the harassment did not end there. People who had heard of her death will go to her grave with pointed fingers and make snide remarks about how if she were to die eventually, she might as well have done it before she had lost her honour.
If someone were to see her right now, the same sort of criticism will befall her. So Deertes believed it was a good thing that there was no one here to observe what she was doing.
If someone were to see her right now… She will be forced to die instead.
“Please… Save me…”
Tears that she could not hold back started to flow again. If such a life-threatening situation were to happen to her, she thought she would have been able to throw away her life to protect her and her family’s pride.
No. All the things that she had been educated on ever since birth was useless in the face of death. Deertes bowed her head. She could not stand throwing away everything in order to survive. Even now, she was afraid that he would end up abandoning her.
“Deertes.”
Cassar called her name. He took her hand, which was on top of his, very carefully yet strongly, he pulled.
Deertes fell into his arms with a tug.
“The vow has successfully been pledged.”
Deertes was stunned upon hearing his words.
Lachlan stood up while holding Deertes’ hand. He could feel himself shaking with excitement. If it wasn’t for the situation that they were in, he would hug Deertes and cry.