As Kit entered the library, she felt some sort of aura around her. She had no idea what it was or why she was feeling that way. She calmed her pounding heart and quickly hurried to find Edwin. Her eyes soon fell upon him.
Edwin was sitting in his usual chair next to the windowsill, alive and well and reading a book. Kit, mesmerized, couldn’t take her eyes off him.
At that moment, the sun began to set behind the horizon. Soon, the golden glow of the sunset fell on his silver hair. The look felt unreal, which made Kit wonder whether or not she was in a dream. If it indeed was a dream, she prayed for it to not be over.
Kit walked a little closer to him with trembling steps. As she approached, he didn’t raise his head or even seem to pay attention. He continued flipping through the page of his book quietly. He was indeed the Edwin that Kit knew. Edwin rarely looked at other people and was glued to his books.
“Edwin.”
Kit called his name in a small voice. It was a name that was always buried deep and repeated in her heart. However, her voice didn’t seem to reach him.
Because Kit did not want to repeat the mistake she had made in the past, as well as to not ignore his soft eyes buried in redemption, she plucked up the courage to step one foot closer.
At that moment, his face began to turn towards her. His skin glowed in the light of the sunset. Like that day three years ago, both Edwin and Kit’s eyes locked at each other. Kit felt as if time stopped and the two were the only ones left in the world.
Edwin’s eyes were distinctly different from those seen only in Kit’s imagination. His black eyes were shining brightly, as if to prove he was indeed alive.
Kit knew she would like to see his eyes a little closer; she was greedy to touch him. She thought that if she was able to touch him, it would make it more believable that he was indeed alive in front of her eyes.
As soon as those thoughts entered Kit’s head, she stepped closer. Before she knew it, she was so close to Edwin that she was afraid the fast beating of her heart would be audible.
Edwin’s indifferent gaze was still locked on her. Kit had approached him to share a conversation but was lost for words. In embarrassment Kit just crumpled the hem of her dress a few times.
“Um… Excuse me…?” Kit found the courage to say a few words, but there was no answer from him. Are you really alive? she thought.
Kit wanted to ask that, but instead of asking, she stretched her hand out. She didn’t know why she had such courage. But she didn’t even have enough time to think about the reason. Within seconds, Kit’s fingertips touched Edwin’s cheeks. The first thought that rushed into Kit’s head was that he was warm. Real warmth that made it evident that indeed Edwin was alive.
As soon as the warmth sank into Kit’s fingertips, a tear fell from her eyes, followed by another. Her tears flowed uncontrollably, soaking her cheeks and dripping onto her dress.
Then Edwin’s indifferent gaze turned sharp as he frowned faintly.
“Are you crazy?” He slapped Kit’s hand away. “What is wrong with you?”
Edwin glared at Kit as he lifted himself from his seat. Ignoring Kit, he exited the library. Kit looked behind him, dazed, and soon chased after him. She couldn’t let him go like this. Her vision was blurry because of her tears, but that was not important to her.
His steps were so fast that Kit could barely reach him until he left the library. In order to stop him, she reached out and grabbed the ends of his jacket. At her fingertips, she felt a real sense of fabric that made it more evident that she was not in a dream
This is not a dream, Kit thought.
“Wait a minute. I need to talk to you.” She cried, clutching onto his jacket. Her voice sounded hoarse as she tried to swallow up her tears.
“Do you even know me?” He answered coldly. “Let go of me. You’ll crumple my clothes.”
“Oh! I’m sorry… I mean…” Kit let go of his jacket. She had no idea what to say in order to make him stop. She lowered her hand and tried to think of something helpful. Fortunately, the tears in her eyes had stopped.
It wasn’t long before she lifted her head and tried to look at Edwin, but he had disappeared out of sight. Kit quickly came to her senses and looked around to find him. But he was nowhere to be seen.
He disappeared so suddenly. As Kit stood in the entrance to the library, she wondered if she was still dreaming.
But the touch of his robe was vivid amongst her fingertips.
Is this all real?
Sleep did not come easily that night. Kit was very tired, but her mind was restless. Sensing that sleep would not occur, she forced herself out of bed and put on a shawl. There was no sign of the sun rising outside the window, so she wandered around the room meaninglessly, observing her room and comparing it to how it was in the past.
Next to the head of the bed were items that had been handled with great care in the past. At least there wasn’t a change of scenery of what Kit remembered two years ago. The only change was that Edwin was alive.
As Kit laid back on the bed and tried to go to sleep, she felt more anxious than ever. She was afraid that once she fell asleep and woke the next day she would magically be brought back to her present time. A time where she had to see her husband have an affair with her own sister and live in a world where Edwin did not exist.
It was terrible to even imagine. Kit tried her best to stay awake all night, but her efforts didn’t go as well. It wasn’t long before she fell into a dreamless sleep.
*
Kit opened her eyes as soon as she felt the sun’s rays on her face. She was mad at herself for sleeping despite making a promise to herself to stay awake. As soon as she got up, she rushed over to the calendar.
October 3, Year 263.
The time was still two years ago. No, two years ago and a week before Edwin died. Kit remembered the exact day Edwin died in the carriage accident. October 10, Year 263.
Is it okay to accept that Year 263 had become my current present?
Edwin’s image continued to hover in Kit’s head. She replayed Edwin’s voice over and over in her head.
‘Are you crazy?’
Of course, what he said was not exactly sweet. Kit threw on some clothes and hurried out of her room, so she met Edwin in the library again.
She wasn’t sure whether she would be able to talk to him, or if Edwin would even consider listening to her. Kit was very anxious, but she couldn’t have those thoughts stop her from saving him. She was the only one who knew he was going to die in a carriage accident within a week, which made her be the only one that could save him.
She made it her mission to save him. To achieve her mission, Kit had to convey her message to Edwin properly. She had to tell him that he shouldn’t be in a carriage.
Before he died in vain again.
Kit walked over to the library, a slight spring in her step. When she arrived, Edwin was sitting next to the window as always, his head deep in a book. Kit took a long breath and sat across from him.
“Hello, Edwin.”
It was the first time she spoke to someone so confidently. Even though she drew all her confidence from the bottom of her chest to talk to him, her voice still trembled faintly. Kit waited silently for Edwin’s answer, but there was no return. Edwin was completely ignoring Kit to the point she felt embarrassed. His eyes were glued to his book as if he hadn’t heard anything.
So, Kit, feeling a little bolder, did something drastic. She leaned towards him and forced his book shut. When the book he was reading suddenly closed, Edwin looked up and glared coldly at Kit.
“What are you doing?” he snapped.
“Arthur dies. Bella, who is left alone, prays to die, but Arthur’s soul stops Bella from dying. Arthur ascends the sky with Bella’s promise not to die again. But Bella dies as soon as his soul disappears, so they can be together again.”
It was the ending of Edwin’s book. There was no way for Kit to know the contents in the current time. It was because she read all the books Edwin had read in the past.
“I asked you what you were doing.” Edwin repeated, his fingers gripping around the book.
“It’s about the book you were reading. I’m sorry if I offended you.” Kit looked down at her hands, not wanting to meet Edwin’s gaze.
“Who are you to tell me the ending of the book I am reading, and why do you keep bothering me?”
“Well, I’m…” Kit opened her mouth to speak, but Edwin cut her off.
“Gods, you’re ugly.” He said bluntly.
Edwin has told Kit that she was ugly, but for Kit that didn’t mean anything. She had already heard it a lot from her family all her life, so she was immune. But that didn’t mean hearing she was ugly was something good to hear. Kit shouldered the insult and answered him as if nothing was wrong.
“Even though I may be ugly, I still have something to say to you. If I didn’t close your book, it seemed as if you would continue to ignore me.”
“I don’t want to hear it,” Edwin replied, opening up his book, “I don’t want to hear what you have to say. Get out of my sight.”
Even though Kit thought Edwin would at least be slightly interested, his cold face and irritated tone made it even clear that he was not. But Kit didn’t have time to deal with that. She knew she had to push and annoy him further to save him. To achieve her mission.
“Wait, please! It’s important.” She pleaded with him, desperate to get his attention. When Edwin tried to turn to the page he was on, Kit slammed the book shut again. This, in turn, made Edwin even more irritated.
“What in the world are you doing?!” He yelled, trying to rip the book from her grasp.
“You should not take the carriage to the palace next week.”
Kit cut Edwin off and spoke to him in a serious voice. As if pleading to listen to her at least once. “If you take that carriage, you’ll… You’re going to die.”